Cameron’s cabinet reshuffle has put me in mind of re-organising my own inner circle.
I’m thinking of replacing my mother with the nice lady at Morrisons deli counter who always gives me an extra slice of salami.
Mindful as I am of mum’s contribution in the childbirth department, I’ll naturally secure her a place on the backbench.
My best friend polls well on experience and loyalty. But, frankly, the catatonic wino I met on Southsea common was a much better listener.
As for my husband, his austerity measures have never had my vote.
And his continued refusal to read the long-haul holiday brochures I keep slipping into his despatch box is threatening to undermine our coalition.