By the time Downton’s on, I may well have exploded

Clive Smith says he would not like to arm wrestle athlete Caster Semenya 		Picture: Martin Rickett/PA Wire

CLIVE SMITH: English pigs? Don’t bite the hand that feeds you

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I’m due to finish work at 7pm on Christmas Eve.

By 7.20pm the front door will be locked and Christmas for me can well and truly begin.

Logs will be blazing on the fire and we will sit down to our traditional meal of a pate and cheese picnic after putting little Freddie to bed.

Finally, to get us in that warm Christmas spirit, we will watch the movie Love Actually.

I’ll moan and protest about watching this soppy blockbuster, but will secretly be enjoying it as we talk about our favourite characters.

Then it’s the magic of Christmas morning.

Ours will begin this year when Young Sir decides to wake up, which is normally around 7am.

I made Eggs Benedict for breakfast last year, but this filled us up too much before the main dinner and the amount of oil used would worry Fawley refinery that they may run out!

This year, the whole of Sarah’s family are descending on her mum and dad. We entertained last year, but since then two new additions have arrived. Thirteen people and three dogs need a lot of room.

I’m used to a quieter Christmas growing up on the Isle of Wight. I was a very happy only child, but Sarah is one of four, so it will be messy!

Over the years, I’ve grown to love the taste of turkey and, if cooked well, I actually prefer it to chicken.

Brussels sprouts no longer fill me with dread, especially if fried with lardons.

The open fire will be roaring, Christmas games will be played and we’ll fall silent for the Queen’s Speech at 3pm before devouring chocolates in front of the telly.

By the time Downton Abbey is on, I may well have exploded.

I know how lucky I am to be part of a big family Christmas. There have been times that hasn’t been the case, for one reason or another, so I’m grateful.

I do hope you have an enjoyable Christmas and all that remains is for me to say thank you for putting up with my ramblings, not only here in The News but on the radio too!

I hope you all have a very merry Christmas.