Cameras call brings to mind sows’ ears and silk purses

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It has been decided to place two low-level cameras in the House of Commons after MPs complained the elevated ones currently in use presented unflattering images of them.

Sows’ ears and silk purses spring to mind, and it is doubtful whether the combined efforts of Cecil B de Mille and Steven Spielberg could improve the impression most of our elected representatives present to the nation at large.

They will be asking for computer-generated images next, in a doomed bid to make some of them appear charismatic and intelligent.

The entire exercise is like the woman who asks her husband: ‘Does this dress make my bum look big?’ and is then told: ‘No. It’s your bum that makes your bum look big.’