CLIVE SMITH: I need to do some work on my hurdling technique

'˜Woke up this morning feeling fine, I've got promotion on my mind'.
Pompey's promotion pitch invasionPompey's promotion pitch invasion
Pompey's promotion pitch invasion

‘Paul Cook’s taking us up, like he said he would.

‘Oh yeah, somethin’ tells me I’m into something good.’

That song has been playing over and over in my head ever since we beat Notts County away.

I didn’t care much for the original, apparently released way back in 1964 by Herman’s Hermits. Anyway, I’m not that old!

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But it was fantastic to hear this version belted out time after time by the Pompey faithful at Meadow Lane.

Honestly, watching Pompey get promotion from Division Two was right up there as one of the best matches I’ve ever been to – and I’ve been to a few.

Hopefully it’s the start of more promotions to come.

Some fans are not keen on American former Disney boss Michael Eisner buying the club and I can understand why.

They’ve seen what’s happened in previous years when wealthy people have taken over.

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They like the idea of a community-owned club where people have a say in how the Pompey they love operates.

But the problem with that is it does limit our ambitions.

Without serious amounts of cash, we’re simply not going to get back to the Premier League status we once enjoyed.

Who knows what’s going to happen?

All I know is that if we are going to enjoy any more promotion parties in the future, then I need to get in training.

Not being 18 any more, or having the ability of Colin Jackson, I reckon that I’ll have to do some serious work on my hurdling technique.

Why?

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Have you seen how high those advertisement hoardings around football pitches are?

If you want to join in joyous pitch invasions, then that means getting over the boards.

The bruises I still have on my knees from that glorious day at Notts County are testament to my lack of athleticism – although I reckon that I’m still pretty adept at swerving to avoid a rugby tackle or two!

CORBYN WINNING THE ELECTION COULD SOLVE OUR OBESITY CRISIS

Amid nationwide demonstrations and protests, three people have been killed and dozens hospitalised in Venezuela.

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This comes as 75 per cent of Venezuelans have lost an average of 19lbs in weight due to a nationwide food shortage, with a third of its people eating two or fewer meals a day.

The supermarket shelves are empty and so are people’s stomachs.

Critics have blamed the widespread economic and political problems on the incumbent socialist government run by President Nicolas Madura.

If Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn somehow becomes PM after the general election, maybe this could be the answer to our country’s obesity crisis. Socialism, a diet that actually works.

THEY MAY HAVE MILLIONS, BUT IT SEEMS THEY CAN’T BUY LOVE

The curse of the lottery has struck again.

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Seems that a couple who scooped a £40.6m EuroMillions jackpot are splitting up.

Gareth and Catherine Bull became millionaires overnight following their big win in 2012.

But he’s reportedly moved out of the family home in Mansfield, where Catherine will apparently continue to live with the couple’s two teenage sons.

The 45-year-old builder is now living in a three-bedroom cottage nearby.

What is it about lottery winners?

They win big and then they fall out.

Maybe the money just ends up exposing cracks that were already there.

They do say that you can’t buy love...