Marriage? Cage those birds!

Wedding fair at St John's church, Stanground. Pictured with a white dove on show from  from The White Dove Loft is bride to be  Dawn Abbott. ENGEMN00120121013130249

Wedding fair at St John's church, Stanground. Pictured with a white dove on show from from The White Dove Loft is bride to be Dawn Abbott. ENGEMN00120121013130249

Lesley says we could live without electronics on flights

LESLEY KEATING: Shouldn’t there be a total ban on electronic devices on planes?

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Wildlife experts have warned that the craze for releasing flocks of white doves at weddings or funerals could endanger the environment by leaving large numbers of birds to fend for themselves in the wild.

This made me think.

Given what tends to happen in marriages, wouldn’t a more appropriate ceremony be for some birds to be caged up rather than set free?

Sorry to be so cynical, but I think that would be more apt.

n So, the hotel that inspired the sitcom Fawlty Towers has been knocked down to make way for luxury flats.

Anyone else hoping that it won’t be the builder that Basil used on the show who is going to be erecting them?

n Can someone tell me why so many fish and chip shops are called something like ‘The Admiral?’

I mean, how many Royal Navy admirals are good at catching quality fish and chips?

It’s not really their job.

I think I’d rather get my fish from a chippie called ‘The Trawler Skipper’.

 

n A team at Birmingham University has apparently perfected a technique which uses blasts of ultrasound to trigger healing processes in the mouth which can repair damaged and decayed teeth.

Well, this is what they say they’ve achieved after tests.

But does anyone else think when the people with bad teeth were told their mouths were going to blasted with ultrasound, they all immediately said ‘Ooh, my teeth are suddenly much better, thanks.’

In fact, never mind an ultrasound.

All they need to do is recreate the sound of a dentist’s drill to have everyone rushing out of the chair saying their teeth feel great!

According to a new poll of airline passengers, no British airline has made it onto a list of the top 10 European carriers. Ever get the feeling it’s because the passengers were so cramped they couldn’t get the pens out of their pockets to fill the surveys in?

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