Quit whining - and if you can’t cope, buy some hair dye

Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran
Mo Farrah after missing out on a gold medal
				 Picture: Adam Davy

VERITY LUSH: Leave me to browse the make-up counter in peace

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In this world of blame and claim and ‘no win, no fee’ legal firms touting for business, I thought I had heard everything.

But the other day I discovered I was so very wrong.

In the USA lives a 13-year-old boy who has decided, in his infinite wisdom, that he is going to sue his own parents, aided and abetted by a lawyer who feels the child may win his frankly incredible $2m claim.

So why do you think he is claiming? Neglect? Violence? Cruelty?

No, nothing so remotely pedestrian. He is suing his own parents because he was born ginger!

The boy claims his life has been blighted by the prejudices he feels he’s had to endure as a redhead.

As both his parents are also redheads, he feels they should have considered in advance that they might pass on genes for red hair.

He is well, healthy, cared-for and loved, yet he is claiming for the ‘misery’ of being labelled ‘carrot-top, ginger freak and strawberry shortcake’, resulting in a ‘loss of enjoyment of life’.

‘My client has been intentionally exposed to a life of rejection and bullying,’ proclaims his lawyer.

But surely, at 13, his life hasn’t even started yet!

The trial is setting a legal precedent and could open the floodgates for similar cases.

So does that mean I can now sue for being born dark with hazel eyes instead of blonde and blue-eyed?

I have red-headed friends. Most are still proudly ‘ginger’, yet one or two are now blonde by choice.

History is littered with famous and successful redheads, from Henry VII and Elizabeth I to Damien Lewis, Ed Sheeran, Prince Harry and Jessica Rabbit.

I bet nearly all of them got called something like carrot-top at some point, just like most of us non-redheads probably got called something or other too.

But they all learned to be resilient and deal with it because such is life.

So forgive me if I am not sympathetic to the poor little darling, but I think he should just quit whining, count his many blessings… and if he really can’t cope, maybe buy some hair dye.

BRAVO TO SCARLETT FOR GETTING HER OWN BACK ON SCHOOL BULLY

This story made me cheer inwardly. Gogglebox star turned TV presenter Scarlett Moffatt unexpectedly got her own back on the school bully who made her life a misery.

She met her by chance in a supermarket when the woman rushed over to tell her how impressed her young children were that she’d gone to school with a celebrity.

‘They think I’m the coolest mum ever,’ she gushed.

But Scarlett reportedly cut her short, reminding her they hadn’t actually been friends at all because she’d tormented her for years about her appearance.

Scarlet then told the woman she hoped her children never had to deal with anyone like that at their own schools and walked out, leaving the bully open-mouthed. Bravo Scarlett!

CHOOSING A WEDDING DRESS WILL BE EASIER IN COMPARISON

A friend is going through traumas helping her daughter choose the perfect prom dress.

They’ve been to virtually every specialist shop in the western hemisphere, but have still not found ‘the one’. A recent princess-style number with tulle skirt and sequinned overlay was finally rejected on the grounds that it was too similar to one a friend had and, yes, there were tears.

Hire costs for this kind of dress start at over £600.

And don’t even mention the shoes, the jewellery and the makeup.

My poor friend is tearing her hair out in clumps and will probably be a gibbering wreck by the end of this.

By way of comfort, helping her choose a wedding dress one day is likely to be far easier in comparison.