RICK JACKSON: To move or not to move? That is the question

Rick is considering wearing makeup to knock a few years off his age (Shutterstock)

Our house is bursting at the seams and maybe now is the time to upgrade.

We have friends and family who have recently moved into a bigger house – stretched themselves somewhat to move into their ‘forever home’.

Others have had extensions built and we’ve followed the progress on social media – from the first bit of earth removed to the state-of-the-art taps flowing for the first time.

The old saying goes, ‘It’s best to have the worst house on the best road rather that the best house on the worst road.’

So, what do we do?

We bought our current house before we had children, but we did want to start a family and we thought this was the perfect house to do so.

We have a wonderful big, westerly-facing garden and we have already put our own stamp on the house, adding a conservatory and off-road parking.

Then arrived the patter of little tiny feet.

We thought we’d only have one. But here we are, four years later, with two little cherubs.

Every cupboard is stuffed with toys, clothes, shoes and coats.

That wonderful conservatory is now a playroom and the off-road parking contains two family SUV cars.

Thing is, we love it here.

We are minutes from the beach and the schools are excellent. Selling would not be a problem, houses go in minutes here.

We’d sell, then instantly regret it, I’m sure.

You also have to remember, simply moving alone would cost £15,000, what with taxes and other charges.

We could spend that converting the loft into an en suite bedroom.

Then again, imagine the upheaval of all that work. What if we built an extension off the back too? Maybe that £15,000 is worth spending to avoid the hassle?

One thing is for certain, we don’t have room for anymore children.

After our last wonderful surprise, maybe it’s not an estate agent or an architect I need to call, but the urologist!

A CALORIFIC SAUSAGE ROLL AND A SCARIFIER AT THE SUPEMARKET

What are our super markets trying to do to us?

Firstly, Tesco is stopping selling 5p carrier bags. Soon, it’s the 10p bag for life, or nothing. This will almost bankrupt me as I have plenty of bags for life but I keep leaving them in the blimin’ car!

Then Morrisons starts selling the UK’s biggest sausage rolls. It’s a whole foot long and contains 1,600 calories.

If it isn’t bad enough being in a Sunday bun fight in Lidl’s middle aisle, Asda say they will have even more amazing bargains when Black Friday

returns.

I think I need to get some boxing gloves. The exercise will burn off the sausage roll and I’d win the bun fight for the grass scarifier at Lidl.

MAKEUP FOR MEN? GO ON THEN – BECAUSE I’M WORTH IT

L’Oréal say we could see male makeup counters within the next five-toseven years.

Apparently makeup has become more accepted for men who are part of the selfie generation.

I’ll be honest with you, I’m tempted to try. We recently had a photoshoot for my breakfast radio show, the results of which you can see on billboards around the city.

The make-up lady managed to take 10 years off me. I can’t see myself applying foundation and mascara every morning at 4.30am, but certainly for events and parties. Why not try and look your best?

I’ll need plenty of advice from those makeup counters though, otherwise I’ll end up looking like Robert Smith from The Cure!