Smelly first dates, snack machines and Bob Dylan have all had me thinking this week.

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Memphis Zoo officials have banned a woman after saying she climbed over a barrier to the enclosure where lions are kept and tried to feed them.

This made me think about the stupid things we do at zoos.

Why do we do the following two? One, make faces at the animals we’re looking at as if we’re imitating them.

Do we think they’re going to be impressed?

Secondly, take our new partners on dates there.

Why do we think it’s 
romantic taking someone to a place that smells like the zoo?

Is watching a giraffe going to the toilet really conducive to romance?

n Nestlé says it’s planning to build a Star Trek style machine which produces food at the press of a button which is individually tailored to a person’s needs.

Am I missing something here? If it is food individually tailored to a person’s needs then such a machine already exists for me.

It’s called the radio station vending machine that hands out crisps, fizzy pop and chocolate.

Throw in the machine that gives me coffee and I’m totally catered for already.

n Handwritten lyrics to the Bob Dylan classic Like A Rolling Stone have sold at auction for more than £1m.

When I heard this I thought to myself, if you were going to write lyrics to a song now, you’re more than likely going to type them into a laptop, tablet or phone.

But that means in future they’re not going to be worth anything, because anyone could have typed them up.

So, if you’re a singer-songwriter, it’s worth making sure you work on your English skills so you can write your lyrics long-hand, and make them legible enough for people to read them and make out that they’re genuine.