Tatty boxes, lengthy calendars and other Christmas mysteries

Rick's talent makes Lionel Messi look average                                           Picture: Martin Rickett/PA Wire

RICK JACKSON: How I led Pompey to European glory

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Why do so many people keep their Christmas decorations in a tatty box?

They can have the loveliest decorations in the world, but you can be almost certain that the box they keep them in won’t have been replaced for at least a dozen years.

It’s usually a big cardboard thing that gets dragged down from the loft every year with flopping sides that have been half ripped off and virtually no substance, but it just never gets chucked out.

Come on, how about 
buying a new plush Christmas decorations storage box as a treat this year?

I have a question regarding the calendars you buy for people at Christmas. Why have so many shops started selling calendars of different time lengths?

I’ve started noticing that you can buy 14-month and 16-month calendars, .

Now, I don’t mean to be a traditionalist about this, but in my opinion a calendar should only ever be 12 months long.

That’s why they call it ‘a calendar year’. If the calendar makers happen to have 14 good photos on a theme that they’d like to use in a calendar, then it’s tough.

They’re just going to have to pick the best 12. Let’s put an end to this extra-long calendar madness, please!

I was just wondering... is there a sadder sight at Christmas than watching men aimlessly wandering around the women’s clothes section of a department store trying to find presents for their partners? 

These guys are the most forlorn-looking creatures you could ever come across, aren’t they?

Can I suggest something here? If you see one of these guys wandering hopelessly around Debenhams, whisper something in their ear.

Tell them the way to the gift voucher counter and put them out of their misery.

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