Why don’t we scuttle the Ark Royal for divers and surfers?

Steve's baby daughter made amazing progress this week, or so his wife thought

STEVE CANAVAN: It was a lot of rattle over just a little roll

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There have been many suggestions of a future use for the former aircraft carrier Ark Royal. A lot of them have been daft, but I have a plan that could kill two birds with one stone.

One idea was to scuttle her off the Devon coast to become a wreck for divers to explore. But why not scuttle her off the beach at Boscombe, replacing that useless surf reef the council built?

Her bulk would kick up some waves for surfers whilst the divers could happily explore underneath.

Then I thought no, she’s our ship so we’ll keep her.

Let’s sink her off the Witterings for our surfers and divers.

With great ideas like this, I think I may well go into politics!