Hairy heroes The Beards swing by Southsea one final time

After more than a decade of follicly-focused fun, Australian band The Beards have decided to call it a day, but not before spreading the word on the joys of face-fuzz one last time on a final tour.
The Beards Farewell Tour. Picture by Anders M TeibelThe Beards Farewell Tour. Picture by Anders M Teibel
The Beards Farewell Tour. Picture by Anders M Teibel

With five albums under their collective belts, Johann Beardraven, Facey McStubblington, John Beardman Jr and Nathaniel Beard will be stopping off at The Wedgewood Rooms. WOW247 caught up with Nathaniel.

Do you feel you have fulfilled your mission to bring hairy rock to the masses?

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When we started our mission back in 2005 the world was a very different place. It was a terrible time. Hurricane Katrina. Bird flu. And not many beards. We just felt we had to do something. There wasn’t much we could do about those first two things, but we felt the very least we could do was form a militant rock band that exclusively performs songs about beards.

We didn’t anticipate the public demand for pro-beard activist rock, and we ended up spending more than a decade touring the world, releasing five albums and growing some seriously large beards.

It’s an experience we would strongly recommend to anyone, but now our mission has been accomplished, beards are well and truly back, and we’re doing one last tour to celebrate beards and say goodbye to everyone who’s supported us.

Have you actually run out of things to say about beards?

We’ve now written 56 songs about beards, which we feel is the ideal number to perfectly express exactly how much we enjoy beards. Having said that, as our beards grow longer, we’ll probably gain even more perspective and write more songs about beards.

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Is there any more material tucked away? Can we look forward to any posthumous releases?

We’re thinking of releasing a beard-themed children’s album – songs to indoctrinate your children to. But we won’t rule out propagating beards in any way we see fit and we will ensure the world remains a beardy place by any means necessary, be it musical or otherwise.

Will any of you shave your beards off after the final show, or are they for life, regardless of the band?

I can categorically say that no member of our band will be removing their beard at any point in the near or distant future. Nobody is as brainwashed by our propaganda as we are.

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Who will fly the flag for hirsute rock after your demise? Is there anyone who you can see filling your shoes?

We like to think we’re retiring from touring at just the right time. The bearded are living in a golden age, and after 11 years of touring all over the place and singing songs about beards, a militant beard-themed propaganda rock band may no longer be required.

What’s next for the band members after the last show?

We’ll just be growing our beards, enjoying other people’s beards, and resting on our laurels.

So you’re definitely not about to shave?

Only the bearded truly understand that to have a beard is to live every single moment of your life in a state of pure bliss and ecstasy unrivalled by anything. To answer your question... no.

The Wedgewood Rooms, Southsea

Tuesday, October 18

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