Lesley Keating

LESLEY KEATING: How British – mowing the lawn after dark wearing a head torch

We Brits are a funny bunch, aren’t we?   It seems like we’re never happier than when we’re moaning about the weather. 
Airports and early mornings don't mix... as Lesley discovered to her cost.

LESLEY KEATING: The things we do in our airport stupor

On checking in for our holiday in Crete, despite a terrifyingly early start and wandering around in a zombified stupor, Mike and I decided to hit the Duty Free shops separately and reconvene later.
'... she ploughed on regardless, running really fast to the sea...'

LESLEY KEATING: Don’t put your pants on inside out

Over the years we’ve heard many stories from friends who have been to the Isle of Wight festival, like my old school pal Avril who sat next to the Stereophonics on the ferry back and had a good old chat... with no idea who the ‘nice Welsh boys’ were.

Lesley ended up looking like Malcolm McDowell's character Alex DeLarge in a Clockwork Orange

LESLEY KEATING: Want a good laugh? Try magnetic eyelashes

False eyelashes and me don’t get on. I look like something out of A Clockwork Orange and either get glue everywhere, or they fall off sideways. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve bought sets only to chuck them away. Never learn, do I?

Mid-summer, but autumn beckons. Revellers, druids and pagans at Stonehenge

LESLEY KEATING: The nights are about to start drawing in – hello summer!

It’s the summer solstice on Thursday, the mid-heaven, the longest day, the magical one with the most sunlight hours, when the sun is at its strongest and brightest.

Imperfect courgettes

LESLEY KEATING: These wonky fruit and veg labels are just bananas!

Some supermarkets are now selling something they call ‘wonky’ fruit and vegetables; those which they want to sell but which apparently don’t meet the general guidelines for aesthetic beauty.

As an only child, Lesley never felt lonely.

LESLEY KEATING: Don’t condemn me for being an only child

Lots of parents say they don’t want their first-born growing up an ‘only child’ as though it’s some sort of social stigma. After all, they’ll be spoiled, not know how to share, lack confidence and be unable to make friends.

Do you prefer the honesty of New Look's pricing policy?

LESLEY KEATING: It’s not a fat tax, just honest selling

Aren’t we easily-offended these days. Fashion retailer New Look has come in for quite a bit of flack after a shopper reported that trousers in its ‘Curves’ range – aimed at plus-sized women – cost 15 per cent more than the same ones in its standard range.

Could new home secretary Sajid David be a breath of fresh air?

LESLEY KEATING: Until we genuinely see everyone as equal, we have no hope

Following the demise of Amber Rudd we now have a sparkly new home secretary in the form of Sajid Javid.

Steve Strange in his Visage days

LESLEY KEATING: My trip down Soho’s memory lane as an Old Romantic

Have you ever wanted to travel back in time? Well, the other night I was transported right back to the 1980s!

Starstruck Lesley followed Jude Law around the supermarket

LESLEY KEATING: Tailing Jude Law around Waitrose

On occasions, you might see someone famous off-duty, like daughter Eloise who nabbed an unexpected selfie with her idol, Matty Healy of The 1975, while shopping in Acne Studios, or when Mike nearly trod on Brian May’s toe at Heathrow Airport!

Surely, holding a door open for a member of either sex is just good manners?

LESLEY KEATING: Would you dare hold a door open for a woman?

I’m getting increasingly frustrated by discussions on why men shouldn’t hold doors open for women. It seems to be fashionable right now for independent women to belittle men and denounce door-holding as ‘patronising, condescending and anti-feminist’.

The danger of vegan food...

LESLEY KEATING: Burning issue of being a dutiful wife

Poor Mike. Firstly, he married a blonde but ended up with a brunette when I literally went back to my roots, embracing my dark side, but that was a long time ago and he’s forgiven me.

Ant McPartlin leaving a house in west London after he was interviewed by police on suspicion of drink-driving

LESLEY KEATING: Let’s hope Ant will be able to weather this latest storm

What is going on with Ant McPartlin? After a very public addiction to painkillers and alcohol and subsequent rehab, he was back on track co-presenting I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here in December with best buddy Declan Donnelly.

Snow joke - empty supermarket shelves

LESLEY KEATING: A little snow and supermarket shelves are empty

I’d expected there to be a few gaps on supermarket shelves for a short while, courtesy of the recent white-out from the Beast from the East.

Picture: Shutterstock

LESLEY KEATING: A sharp lesson on Mothering Sunday that I’ll never forget

When I was 10, I forgot Mothering Sunday. To be fair, my dad had probably dropped a few hints, but I’d been far too wrapped up in whatever my 10-year-old self was fascinated by to notice.

Picture: Shutterstock

LESLEY KEATING: A white-knuckle pursuit ending with a lesson in trust

Last Monday, I was in a heaving, North London pub watching my daughter Eloise perform with her band. The popular pub was full to capacity, and afterwards I drove her home with her equipment

Dame Vivienne Westwood's global empire has come under fire for saving money by hiring unpaid interns. Picture: Yui Mok/PA Wire

LESLEY KEATING: You can be paid way beyond financially as an intern

I was reading a newspaper on holiday when something made my blood boil. And it wasn’t the warm, sunny weather.

Picture: Shutterstock

LESLEY KEATING: Valentine’s Day always seemed sweeter as a teenager

Wednesday is Valentine’s Day – a day when thoughts turn to love, chocolate consumption hits an all-time high, roses reach crazily inflated prices and you can’t get a table to eat anywhere more exotic than McDonalds if you haven’t booked at least a month in advance.

Picture: Shutterstock

LESLEY KEATING: Hunting for winter sun without any Canary catastrophes

It’s that time again. I know the signs.

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