If you don’t like small spaces, aren’t a fan of making new friends with the table to your immediate left, and chart music just really isn’t your thing – this is not the place for you.
However, if big meaty flavours, unusual cocktails and the above ticks your boxes, then welcome – because this is the place for you.
Hot dog restaurant Bangerz’n’Brewz at Victoria Road South, Southsea, does exactly what it says on the tin: sausages and drinks.
Dish Detective ventures in with a group of pals on a Friday night and we are glad we booked because there is a bottom on every chair and every bar stool.
In other restaurants your hot dog choices are slim pickings. No doubt there’ll be a classic with onions and maybe one accompanied with chilli if you are lucky, but here there is a sausage to suit everyone’s tastes.
Want some heat? Try the Smokin’ Hot Asian (£8.95) with a spicy beef sausage, jalapenos and sriracha chilli sauce. Feeling a bit Christmassy? Then order the secret menu Xmas Dog (£9.95). Yes, I know it’s March but tell me you don’t want a turkey sausage wrapped in bacon, dipped in brie, rolled in stuffing with a drizzle of cranberry sauce wrapped in a Yorkshire pudding?
However, Cheesy BBQ Classic (£7.95) tempts the taste buds for two of us with Swiss cheese, bacon bits and crispy onions.
One of our party is a veggie and is suitably impressed by the separate vegetarian and vegan menu. She picks a Hot‘n’Spicy Not Dog (£8.95) with chilli sauce and jalapenos while my other mate brings up the rear with a Chicago-Style Footlong (£9.95) – a pork frankfurter topped with American cheese, gherkins, bacon and mustard.
Similar to some eateries, you have to choose a side separately instead of it being included in your main price. But this restaurant’s sides go above and beyond the call of duty with the topped fries (£4.95) practically dinner portions just on their own.
Given half of its name celebrates its unique beverages, we are intrigued to see what we can pick for our Friday-night-made-it-to-the-end-of-the-week beverage.
Fratton brewery Staggeringly Good drive the 1.8 miles up the road to deliver their produce for the good people of Portsmouth (and beyond) to enjoy with their hot (or not) dog.
Navy-inspired cocktails are available for those with a sweeter tooth including The Bloody Mary Rose (£7.95) and a vodka orange juice entitled the HMS Prince of Orange (£5.95).
We dive in with three Gin‘n’Titanics (£5.95) and a pepsi (£2.95).
With decisions made, we go to the counter to order and in return receive a big plastic circle that makes a screeching noise to notify you that your food is ready.
Given how you are practically in touching distance of the bar, no matter what seat you are in, to me this aggressive beeper seems a bit much.
It also strikes me after ordering that with a banger, side and brew you are looking at nearly £20 a head, which for sausage and chips sounds a bit pricey.
But on the wall above our heads a sign reads: ‘Good beer ain’t cheap. Cheap beer ain’t good.’
And after our plastic circles scream that our food is ready and we tuck into our meat gifts, I think that motto equally applies to the hot-doggie-goodness served to us on metal trays.
The Not Dog is spicy and apparently up in the top five of veggie dogs that particular diner has ever tasted. The Cheesy BBQ strikes a good a balance of succulent meat and crunchy toppings and the Chicago Foot Long was easily devoured.
We leave stuffed, satisfied and everyone agrees their banger was banging.