It seems that Alun Cochrane is a mass of contradictions. As he puts it: ‘I was born in Glasgow, but I have a Yorkshire accent, a Welsh spelling of my first name and I now live in Manchester.
‘I’m not actually as confused as that sounds though.’
There have been plenty of TV appearances – including 8 out of 10 Cats, Never Mind The Buzzcocks and Have I Got News For You – and on national radio he’s guested on The Now Show and Just A Minute.
He’s also a co-presenter on Frank Skinner’s Absolute Radio show, where’s he’s nicknamed ‘The Cockerel’. But tonight, he’ll be in Horndean, headlining Comedy All Stars.
When did you first realise you were funny?
I was pretty young when it dawned on me that I got a lot more positive attention when being funny than when not doing anything.
I suspect moving schools a lot helped highlight it. Even in adult life I see funny people make friends easier than unfunny ones do.
What would you be if you weren’t a comedian?
A wannabe comedian with a rubbish job.
I’ve recently been told by two different people whose problems I’d listened to that I should become a life coach.
When I told a friend this she said : ‘If you were my life coach I’d kill myself’.
So, the jury is out on my life coaching as a fallback plan.
I hate the idea of getting a real job because I mostly love being a comic.
And most people with real jobs seem pretty miserable about them.
I think if I did have a job I’d like it to have a really low level of responsibility, but I suspect they don’t pay so well.
What’s been the highlight of your career so far?
I made a man puke Guinness all down his T-shirt in Norwich once.
That is the pinnacle for me. Not TV comedy which is often terrible, but live stand-up with real laughter-induced vomit.
I wish I could be that good every night.
Tell us about three things that make you laugh.
My testicles – there are only supposed to be two of them.
Tell us a joke.
I just did one!
Who’s your biggest hero?
Alun Cochrane. Because he is a really funny guy, who half pretends to be miserable whilst secretly trying to engineer a happy life for himself, he has three testicles and is fine with it, and a thinly disguised monstrous ego means he puts himself into interviews as his own hero.
What have you got in the pipeline?
Natural gas, and loads of it. Please don’t tell Russia.
Alun headlines the show tonight at Barton Hall, Horndean Technology College, with Nathan Caton and Rob Deering, with Guide Award-winning comic James Alderson as compere. Tickets cost £10 advance, £15 on the door. Go to comedy-allstars.co.uk