Not such wise words from Rocky | BBC Radio Solent's Alun Newman

That was the genesis that prompted me to enjoy the clever one-liners from some of our best writers and thinkers.

The issue is that most of the one-liners are only useful in the moment you read them.

It’s hard to use them as the building blocks of life. I think that’s because we didn’t earn them. We didn’t have to forge them out of the challenges life throws at us. We read them, enjoy them and forget them.

In order to have our own sayings and phases, we either have to create them or they have to hit us when we need them the most, in order to stick into those less forgetful recesses of our minds.

I’ve noticed my family running out of steam. It’s been unimaginably tough for children, as they’ve been ejected from their education.

Thrown into home-schooling and left with admin and personal motivation most adults would struggle with.

For those facing exams next term, the pressure and worry must be horrible.

For some unlucky children, the support from their school has been no better than a chocolate fireguard.

For others, they’ve had a slightly better run of it.

It’s no surprise that families are feeling the exhaustion of having to become the office, the school, the home.

The boundaries have changed. No surprise that inner-city dwellers grabbed the first chance they could, to get out and see the sea.

That is why this dinner time I will be unleashing Rocky Balboa quotes on my family.

I’ll be using video clips to accompany the presentation and take questions from the floor. There’s no film that better describes getting knocked down and picking yourself up again.

Sylvester Stallone wrote Rocky in three days.

Many people struggled to understand what he was saying.

Even more people said it was going to be a waste of time.

Both the film and the man are an example of not giving up – even after you’ve been repeatedly punched in the head by Apollo Creed, Mr T, Dolph Lundgren, Tommy Gunn.

I shall be starting my dinner table presentation with a paraphrase from the film Rocky Balboa, ‘The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place…

‘But it ain’t about how hard ya hit.

‘It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward...

‘That’s how winning is done!’

My daughter asked whether I thought it was appropriate to use a nearly all male-dominated franchise, to illustrate a point that needed to include both genders.

There were also some questions over the grammar.

‘That’s how winning is done’ caused quite a linguistic commotion.

My son only spoke with his head on the table and said there was a selection of things he felt like hitting.

One of them was his head against the table.

My wife got bogged down in the number of fighters I mentioned, so I was forced to remind her that Rocky fought Apollo Creed twice, because Adrian (wife) spent all his prize money.

This was seen as wholly sexist and a fight broke out at the table.

Which, in many ways, made perfect sense.

I decided that ‘if at first, you don’t succeed, try again and then give up’ (Alun Newman, 2020).

Welcome to the future of dieting

I have been greeted by my wife telling me we have new bathroom weighing scales (no, she didn’t break the others. Rude).

I hold my nerve and say nothing. The old ones kept giving the wrong weight. Again, I say nothing, I’m acutely aware that I’m in a relationship minefield and one wrong move could be catastrophic.

I show interest while I worry about the cost. These new scales are amazing! As with everything these days, download the App. Jump on the scales. Then the magic happens. You get weight, BMI, body composition, bone mass, water mass, and Saturday's lottery numbers. All this data goes straight to your phone. It can plot your progress as you set different targets send you alerts. Each family member has their own set of data. It’s a revolution. The price? Well under £40, which doesn’t seem too bad.

It wasn’t that hard to set up. By the time we’d finished going through the instruction manual, we’d eaten a pack of custard creams. It was late, so we decided to watch telly and have a glass of wine and get ready to ‘jump on’ tomorrow. Disappointing. These scales are reading a tad high like the other ones. We’ve got 90 days before we return them but it’s not looking good.

Why don’t they make tech that works? It makes me so cross!

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