Garages in new-builds are meant for storage, not cars

Ewan McGregor  as Renton in Trainspotting - the gender neutral toilets Zella has visited are almost as grubby

ZELLA COMPTON: Men – just aim it in the right direction and we’ll all be happy!

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I love the story this week of the family who are reportedly suing a major housebuilder after they bought a new house but couldn’t park their car in the garage.

Hold on a minute. Surely you measure the car and garage first before you buy the house?

But should you expect it to fit anyway? I’ve been in my new-build home in Priddy’s Hard, Gosport for six years now and my car has never been in the garage.

Firstly I don’t think it would fit in there and secondly, even I’d struggle to get in because it’s so pokey.

Surely everyone knows that garages in new-builds are meant for storage and not for parking cars?

The garage in my house has been an absolute life-saver, but it looks like I won’t have it for much longer as a move is on the cards.

Are we crazy to leave a house with built-in double wardrobes in two rooms, a garage, shed and loft storage for a house with hardly any storage?

Have we thought this through?

I won’t tell you the full story of the nightmare we’ve endured so far in trying to move, but look out Alverstoke as we’re almost on our way!

The house of our dreams has been found and things are now progressing nicely.

But the character property has no garage, no off-road parking or any built-in wardrobes.

Where will all my wife’s clothes go?

Panic is starting to set in when I look in the garage.

Do we need all this stuff? If we do, where will we put it all?

Where will 10 wardrobes of clothes actually go?

Then the dread continues as my wife goes through all my man gadgets I’ve collected over the years.

Yes dear, I do need those six different coffee-makers.

Yes, those speakers cost a fortune back in the day, even if they have been boxed up for 10 years.

Looks like the house of our dreams will also be a house of compromise.

But we gain a big westerly back garden, a lovely spacious kitchen diner and I get my open fire.

So who needs a garage or a turntable?