I could never be a woman as I just don’t have the patience

COMMENT: All agencies must to held to account for Anne Savidge’s tragic death

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I’m so glad I’m not a woman. I certainly don’t have the patience for a start.

I love the fact it takes me 15 minutes to get ready when going out. A shower is supposed to use less water than a bath, except in our house! Then there’s the hairdrying. Even in the winter the en-suite is like a sauna.

After that, there are the GHDs.

We had a mini disaster on Sunday. Getting ready for a family BBQ, my girlfriend’s hairdryer overheated. Panic stations! Luckily for everyone, she and the hairdryer cooled down after 20 minutes.

I couldn’t go through this ritual on a daily basis. If I was a woman, I may look like a Russian shot-putter but I’d be ready to go in no time.