I first snogged my husband when a colleague was three

Don't worry children, it won't hurt a bit...

CLIVE SMITH: Third World War fears from the internet generation

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You know you’re getting old when you announce to your colleague that you first snogged your husband 21 years ago and your colleague says: ‘I was three years old then’.

When did the world grow up so much? I don’t feel much older than I did back then.

Obviously I haven’t matured as much as I should have mentally either, as what middle-aged woman wanders around thinking people should have information about her snogging from two decades past?

Another side-effect of my age is my confusion over when self-service supermarkets came into being (mentioned in last week’s column).

My friend Google and I stand corrected. Self-service came way before I’d realised – and it started in Portsmouth.