I’m back in the QA, waiting and waiting to be called

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RICK JACKSON: Girl power rules – at the age of two

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So, the decorations are coming down, the belt has been loosened by a notch and the house is in need of a big clean-up. Christmas and new year are over – but what will be different for 2012?

Well, for me, it’s the move into orthodontics. I knew this was coming – after all, I was cursed with a train-track brace for years during my teens and my husband had the same.

My front teeth used to have a massive gap in the middle and they were yanked into place by my silver accessories.

Plus, I had to wear a giant elastic headband which hooked into the back of my mouth every night.

I used to wake up with lines indented in my cheeks, great red wheals which declared to the world (until midday at least) that I was in the care of the Queen Alexandra hospital’s teeth people.

I was left with a small gap which has closed itself up over the years and, to be honest, I kind of miss it. It was quite cute.

I would have thought long and hard about putting my son through what I went through, purely for vanity. We’re so indoctrinated with images of pearly white American teeth that it’s easy to forget that teeth add character to a person.

Just because they’re not straight and blindingly white, it doesn’t mean the owner is lessened in any way.

But his problem isn’t a simple vanity one – his canines are growing sideways. Ouch.

It could well be an hereditary thing, so I guess it was predetermined that I’d be back in the QA again, sitting out the endless wait for his name to be called.

At least the hospital had plenty of reading material on hand to while away the delays, although I’m not sure that magazine articles on subjects such as rape, murder and transgender individuals are the most suitable fodder.

I never realised before that Chat and other similar magazines are so stuffed full of doom until I sat next to my child consuming them with interest.

Unsurprisingly, not once in all the waiting time – and it was long – did I hear ‘I’m bored’.

Let’s hope I find some more suitable reading material next time – which manages to stave off the boredom as effectively – as we’re in for the long haul.