I’m buying my trousers and shirts at the supermarket

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It may not surprise you that I wear only three different pairs of jeans, live in a handful of shirts and wear the same shoes every day.

So why was my wardrobe full to bursting? I’m a hoarder, that’s why.

I cannot bear to part with anything. But when I do get round a spot of de-junking, the cleansing feeling is fantastic and I thoroughly recommend it.

We had a deal. If I hadn’t worn an item in the past two years and it was still in good condition, it was put in the charity pile.

If it had holes in it, it was to go in the skip. If it stood up, we allowed it to walk out of the house on its own!

It was quite embarrassing really. Among the items discovered was a fleece with Cowes Week 1997 on the back. There was also a t-shirt with Bottom on the front and a picture of Rik Mayall and Adrian Edmondson.

Oh, and I mustn’t forget the hideous green and blue shirt I bought from Fosters Menswear way back in 1993.

But you never know when you’re going to need them, do you? I have a collection of trousers I’ve kept that I reckon I’ll wear again when I lose a bit of weight.

Heard that one before? They are 32-inch waist. I was that size in 1994 but not since.

I also have a collection of tops that I keep to wear for cleaning the car or decorating. Well I admit that I rarely do either, so they went straight in the bin.

I’m one of those people who’ll wear something until it falls apart. I go for comfort over style any time, much to the dismay of my wife-to-be Sarah, who must sometimes think her dad is trendier than me.

So how come I had accumulated so many clothes? Well, my frame of mind is never right when I shop for clothes.

Honestly, I’m so bad at it. I pick something up and think ‘I should have that, it’s fashionable’.

Then when I wear it and I look like a member of JLS. At my age, that is just plain wrong!

So what hapopens? I end up hating said garment and in the wardrobe it stays.

From now on, if I need a shirt or a pair of trousers, I’ll buy it from the supermarket along with my bread and milk!

At least I know I’ll be getting value for money.