Oh dear, what have I done? You know that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you realise that you’ve gone and agreed to do something you really shouldn’t have, but you know you can no longer get out of it? Well, I have that feeling right now.
Please, someone help me – I’m heading to boot camp. Little ol’ me, Gobby Gibbs from Portsmouth (who clearly has way too much mouth, which got me into this mess in the first place) is heading off to a week-long military boot camp in the middle of the Norfolk Broads.
It promises to be seven days of pure hell. But I actually put myself up for it. It wasn’t like someone twisted my arm to do it, or persuaded me that it would be ‘fun’.
Quite the opposite. S Club 7 singer, Jon Lee, who is a friend of mine (I have one celebrity that I can call a friend, check me out!) went at the beginning of the year in preparation for his new role in the West End as Frankie Valli in Jersey Boys.
On his return he told me: ‘Cheryl, six out of the seven days was pure torture’.
So what do I go and do – I book myself in!
‘Think Cheryl, think before you act’ is what I should have advised myself.
So I’m packing my bags today and heading off to boot camp tomorrow morning with only a pair of new trainers and a fancy water bottle for comfort.
I have a feeling this is going to be something I shall remember for a lifetime and probably for all the wrong reasons.
It’s not that I’m afraid of being away from home for a week. It’s not even that I’m particularly unfit. I work out (kind of), but it’s the army talk that I’m worried about.
You see, when I was a wee nipper at Cowplain School, the first school trip we went on was to the New Forest for a camping break.
My parents had to come and get me and take me home (so not cool in your first year as a senior) because one of the teachers was ex-military and his idea of ‘tough love’ was, well, tough. I couldn’t handle it and had to leave.
Oh, I was pathetic back then. I just hope this trip has a slightly more positive outcome.
Watch this space to see how I get on.