I wouldn’t want this man anywhere near my children – Clive Smith

Will coffee creams return to pick'n'mix?
Will coffee creams return to pick'n'mix?
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A teaching assistant told the Labour Party conference that ‘a proper education’ system would stop children becoming criminals or Conservatives. What a ludicrous thing to say!

He sounds just like the sort of person you'd want helping your kids doesn’t he?

I haven't got the stats – I'm sure they are on Google if you asked it –  but I'd say that generally speaking Conservative constituencies have lower crime rates and higher education attainment levels than those in Labour-controlled areas. So what this man actually said doesn't make any sense at all.

With some of the things my kids come home from school saying, I swear schools are becoming dens of communism.

I expect each day will soon start with children lined up in assembly having to sing a stirring rendition of The Red Flag and it will mean two weeks in the gulag, I mean detention, for anyone who can't recite the communist manifesto word for word.

This man was way off the mark. It’s the job of teachers to think for themselves and he's in the wrong profession if he thinks otherwise. His idea of a 'proper education' is dangerous. It’s not education he's talking about, it’s brainwashing and indoctrination. Even extremism.

He needs sacking and I certainly wouldn’t want him anywhere near my kids. Education should be politically neutral.

The idea that prisons will empty, the NHS will thrive and social problems will disappear with a 'proper education' is great. We'd all like that. I love the idea, but where’s the wardrobe entrance into this wonderland?

I'm sure good parenting, being taught decent values, and a strong family are more important than education in creating rounded individuals.

There were actually people who clapped his speech. Some even stood to applaud. I'm guessing they’re the same loons who were waving Palestinian flags in the auditorium. Not a Union Flag in sight. How British of them.

I'd give this idiot an A for attention-grabbing and an F for content.

I also think that with a 'proper education' this teaching assistant might one day become a proper teacher.

I’VE ALWAYS HATED MY NAME SO I HOPE IT DOES DIE OUT 

The most popular names of 2017 have just been published with Oliver and Olivia taking the top spots.

I’m not surprised to see that Clive did not make it on to the list. I’d be surprised if it even made it into the top 1,000.

I’ve never met one Clive who likes his name and apparently it’s one of the names in danger of disappearing completely. Good. Hopefully, I’m the last one burdened with the name.  Although I suppose I might grow into it one day… when I’m 87.

The missus had my name tattooed on her wrist the other day. I said at least if we ever split up she’ll be able to blag a story about it being the name of her grandad.

BRING BACK THE COFFEE CREAMS IN NEW-LOOK PICK’N’MIX TINS

All the Christmas bits and bobs have started hitting the high street. The adverts for toys have started, Christmas trees are going up in hotel foyers and John Lewis has announced it’s planning to allow people to fill their tins in the pick’n’mix style.

Happy days, no need for those horrid gold toffee ones to take up unnecessary space. If they bring back the coffee ones I’ll be there on the first day: 1.2kg of coffee creams? Yes please.

It’s never been the same since they were done away with. The tins get smaller every year too. There’s nothing exciting in them and you need to sell a kidney to be able to afford them. But it’s a Christmas tradition so you’ll buy them anyway.