It was a big fuss over very little

All he wanted was his baked potato filled with beans and cheese...

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Folks, I don’t know what all the commotion was about as it was all over in a ‘flash’ (excuse the pun).

I’m talking about The Naked Bike Ride in Portsmouth last Friday.

The event was organised to raise awareness about our dependency on oil and has been going for years in other cities in this country.

But it was its debut in Pompey, - and what a hullabaloo it caused.

It had been publicised in advance in The News and most people I spoke too thought it was a natty idea to attract attention, or weren’t that interested.

But Sarah Carter of Portsmouth’s Family Church was having none of it and took a 1,500-name petition to Portsmouth City Council and the Police to get it stopped.

I’ve met Sarah and she’s a lovely woman. but she should have checked her facts first.

Public nudity in England is NOT an offence providing there is no intention to cause alarm or disorder.

So there you are ladies, next time you wail ‘I’ve got simply nothing to wear’, just nip out in your birthday suit. Joking.

Anyway, I toddled down to The Naked Bike Ride. In front of the beach huts near Canoe Lake there was an assortment of fellas in varying stages of undress.

I went straight to organiser Ian Henden, who looked deliciously wild ’n’ wacky in his Tiger-inspired full body paint, and chatted to him.

It was all very jolly, lots of spectators, police and press, but no objectors.

I think we were all rather disappointed at there being no ranks of placard-waving protesters.

To be honest folks I did giggle to myself because it was really surreal chatting to bare- bottomed men.

The only female cyclist turned up in a long Lady Godiva-esque wig. Sneaky eh?

As the naked bike riders rode off along a windy seafront, I overheard a woman saying: ‘Ain’t that bad. Can’t see nuffink as it’s so bloomin’ cold their dangly bits have disappeared.’

So true, dear. A very big fuss over small things if you ask me.