I've proved that I can cope when left holding the baby
My wife has a part-time job and as I sit here typing these words, sipping an Americano coffee, my six-month-old daughter is asleep upstairs.
I’m also waiting for the shopping to be delivered and a man from Apple is calling me to reset my passwords after I forgot what my favourite car was and the name of the woman who opened the door of the first hotel I stayed at.
Damn those ‘memorable’ questions that are easily forgotten!
So what happens if the phone rings, there’s a knock at the door and Holly wakes from her morning nap? Panic stations!
On top of it all, like her father, Holly has a cold.
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But unlike her father, she has been wiping the contents of her snotty nose across her face and now has a touch of conjunctivitis.
Surely I can cope?
Sarah has left me with a timetable of instructions and even a pie-eating fool such as I can mix up some baby rice with water.
I may stick Holly in the pram and take the dogs for a walk.
The sun is shining, after all.
But knowing my luck, those thunderstorms that were forecast will hit just as we enter the park.
As Holly sleeps, the shopping arrives. I manage to find a home for all the food and sort out the fridge.
Then a call from Apple.
Thirty minutes later, my MacBook is running perfectly.
I find the vacuum cleaner and give the downstairs a bit of a going over. I unload the dishwasher and reload it.
Holly wakes. I give her a bottle and avocado with baby rice for lunch.
The sun is still shining and a check on the rain radar reveals nothing on the horizon.
So we walk the dogs around the park in beautiful sunshine and, during another Americano, I work out how to use Spotify whilst Holly has some ‘tummy time’!
Then another knock at the door. It’s my father-in- law come to take over as I have to go to work.
Do you know, I think Holly and I will be all right on mummy’s future work days...
DAYS OF CLUB LOYALTY IN FOOTBALL ARE WELL AND TRULY OVER NOW
I wish Southampton fans would stop bleating on about Ronald Koeman and loyalty.
Why should a Dutch manager, who has never played or managed in England before, show any when he’s been offered double the money in wages and £100m to splash on new players at Everton?
I don’t remember Southampton showing former manager Dave Jones any loyalty back in 2000.
The days of Alan Knight and Matt Le Tissier-type club loyalty are over.
I’d be excited if I were a fan with the amount of top managers out there.
Bournemouth’s Eddie Howe, David Moyes, Manuel Pellegrini and former Ajax manager Frank de Boer are all bookies’ favourites. And Harry Redknapp is available!
NEXT TIME IT’S A WEEK OFF AND A BOX SET OF WHEELER DEALERS!
I’ve had the most annoying cold for over a week now.
Typical. Nothing all winter and now, with the sun shining, bingo! Sore throat, runny nose and a blocked nose.
I sound awful on the radio. I bet you’re thinking ‘no change there then’...
It turns out ‘man flu’ does exist after all. A professor from New South Wales, Australia, where real men live, says that ‘men have a weaker immune system as an evolutionary adaptation. Testosterone strengthens genes which impair the body’s ability to fight illness.
‘And the part of the brain triggering fever is bigger in men than women.’
So there you have it. Man flu.
Next time I’ll be taking a week off and enjoying a Wheeler Dealers box set!