Jez: Hi mum, this is your son calling. Remember me?

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Research out the other day showed the average girl spends more than two days a year on the phone to her mum with a quarter of women claiming to speak to them at least once a day.

I’m a bloke, but my mum still expects a daily call. This isn’t practical so we catch up every other day. Occasionally I might go more than two days without calling home. Then I get the full wrath of my mother. She will usually say ‘hello, who is this?’, pretending she doesn’t recognise my voice because three days have passed.

Before we all had mobiles my mum called the police and asked them to check on me when she hadn’t heard from me in a few days.

Fair play to them. They actually did turn up checking all was well. I bet that wouldn’t happen these days.