Lobbying of No 10 could look like Baywatch title sequence

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Did you see the pictures of 60 pneumatic women getting aerated in Harley Street about their PIP breast implants? If private clinics refuse to replace them, the ladies will most likely lobby the NHS instead.

I picture buxom lovelies running in slow motion towards Downing Street in an homage to the Baywatch titles. Or perhaps voluptuous hordes will chase health secretary Andrew Lansley down Whitehall and recall scenes from Benny Hill.

If these references are dated, it is because the aspiration to look like a Page Three girl is dated – but, as the outcry shows, is more popular than ever. Replacing PIP implants from the Harley Medical Group alone would cost £40m. I hope Mr Lansley, unlike Benny, keeps his cool and outmanoeuvres the pack.