Lump on my leg made me realise I’m a control freak

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I’ve learned a lot about myself this week – and it’s all thanks to that post-Great South Run lump on my leg that I told you about last week.

I can tolerate a lot of pain. I’ve cut out an ingrowing toenail before and removed a verruca when all treatment had failed.

But by last Thursday, the pain from what was found to be an ingrowing hair on my inner thigh was so great, I had to return to the doctors.

Hardly able to walk with the pain, the doctor took another look and sent me to another doctor, who then sent me to the Queen Alexandra Hospital at Cosham.

Why does the word ‘lanced’ cause such a sharp intake of breath? It’s because you know under that amount of pain is a cyst the equivalent of Mount Etna ready to erupt.

My heart raced as the doctor at the QA prodded and poked my pulsating lump, only to inform me it may well need an operation to remove it.

An operation? This was serious. My mind then swung into action, recalling past episodes of Holby City and Casualty where there had been a ‘complication’ during a simple procedure.

You see, this is precisely why I don’t ever watch Air Crash Investigation.

The mind is a powerful thing. But whilst most normal people can think logically about these things, knowing it’s best to get it sorted, my mind ends up worrying about all the things that could go wrong.

It’s the same problem that stops me from flying or gives the Channel tunnel extra trade when a strong wind blows and I worry that any ferry I get on might not make it across to the other side.

But then I asked myself: am I really a control freak? I’d never normally put myself in that category, but after this little adventure, I think I’m top of that league. In the cockpit of a plane or on the bridge of a ship, I’m cool, calm and collected. Yet as a passenger, I’m a bag of nerves.

Luckily, Mount Etna on my leg burst, the pain became just soreness and the lump is now slowly reducing in size.

Fingers crossed it remains like that, as passing the surgeon a scalpel and applying suction is out of the question if I ever did need an operation!