My Generation? It’s much more like my degeneration

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They say that age is just a number. Well that’s not true as a survey has revealed the 30 telltale signs that you’re getting old – and a third of people questioned reckoned they’d felt examples of ageing between 21 and 29!

These indicators could be anything from falling asleep in front of the telly to hating noisy pubs and choosing clothes and shoes for comfort rather than style.

What’s going on? I can barely remember being in my 20s it was so long ago.

But I’m sure that back then I was full of vim and vigour and not spending my time complaining about aching joints, driving slowly and remarking how there was too much rubbish on TV or that policemen were looking younger.

I was playing lots of sport, was still influenced by fashion and liked cars where bhp and 0-60 times were more important than load-carrying capacity.

Is the pace of modern life such that people are growing old before their time? Forget My Generation, more like my degeneration.

Just as children are rushing through their younger years in this hi-tech age, so 20-somethings are apparently feeling middle-aged.

But if they reckon they’re knocking on, imagine how us 40-somethings feel.

Of course, age is not just a physical thing. Yes, you go grey and your ears and eyebrows mysteriously get hairier, you find you need glasses and you struggle to remember people’s names or where you left things.

But it’s also about an attitude. When you get to a certain point in life, you find yourself complaining more, like Victor Meldrew and Rick Wakeman and all the other celebs on Grumpy Old Men.

You no longer know or care who’s in the Top 10 and would rather listen to Radio 2, you make a groaning noise when you bend down and you know not to overdo the alcohol any more because it takes days and days to recover from the hangover. You also struggle to beat your six-year-old son at computer games.

But the best thing? You realise that all those years you spent worrying about what other people think were a waste of time. Now, where did I put my keys?