No doubt most of us were inundated with boxes of chocolates over the festive period.
My house was no exception. I had an enormous box of Lindt (yum, thank you Pompey Pete) and a few of those Celebrations/Heroes tubs.
You never knew what fruit flavour was under that layer of sweet darkness until you bit into it
Now I don’t mean to be ungrateful, but these are the most boring chocolate assortments ever.
Firstly you pick out all the Maltesers and there are never enough of these because everyone else has the same idea.
Then it’s a free-for-all as we all want the Twirls and the Wispas.
By then I’ve lost interest. Even the appearance of the gooey Creme Egg choccy in the selection doesn’t excite me.
What the heck has happened to them? They taste disgusting ever since Cadbury changed the recipe.
No wonder sales are reported to be down by a staggering £6m, leaving the manufactuer with, erm, Creme Egg on its face.
People don’t like change. We’re happy with things staying the same.
I’m from an era where Starburst were Opal Fruits and Snickers were called Marathons.
And here’s another thing. Why is it the best chocolate bars that get discontinued?
I cried buckets when Texan bars vanished off the shelves. They were a fantastic chocolate, toffee and nougat fusion and a ‘mighty chew’ according to the ads.
They were brought back briefly in 2005, but then disappeared again. That is cruel.
Another love of mine was the Cabana, like a superior version of the Bounty bar with cherries and caramel.
But if I had to choose just one bar to be reintroduced right now, it would have to be Fry’s 5 Centre.
You never knew what fruit flavour was under that layer of sweet darkness until you bit into it.
It seems impossible to think that it hasn’t been around since 1992, although if you pop into good old Wilko you can still get the cream and peppermint versions.
So here’s my message to all the chocolate-makers out there. If you could bring back some of the vintage bars in time for next Christmas, that would be sweet!