There seems to be a magic money tree for Brexit – Opinion

It wasn’t so long ago that we were being coerced into reluctantly having to accept a woolly idea of post Brexit Britain that was supposed to leave us better off and, furthermore, were told that Brexit wouldn’t cost us anything.

We were apparently going to reclaim our power.

It was pedalled as a way for Britain to take back ownership and regain the ability to spend its money – which was going to be plentiful without EU commitments – on what was important.

The words snake oil now come to mind.

How intriguing that we never have any ready monies available when the NHS, law enforcement, education, pensioners and a host of other worthy causes desperately need it.

Yet magic marketing millions have now dropped from the skies.

Hospitals and patients are suffering as doctors leave the service and operations are put on hold, crime soars, the gap in education widens and more people than ever live below the poverty line.

Just think what those campaign millions, which have clearly been magicked up from ‘somewhere’, could have achieved instead.

They could have been used to address the chronic under-funding of many public services.

But that aside, we all know the real reason this ridiculous campaign is being launched is purely to appease those who would have doubtlessly complained that ‘no one told us what to expect’ after the event and to also leave the powers that be looking squeaky clean.

‘It’s not our fault, we told them what to expect…’

In my opinion it’s purely a PR stunt to cover the government’s back. Or possibly another part of its collective anatomy that I’m probably not allowed to mention on here. At best, it’s a very expensive, flimsy and ineffective plaster to be used for covering a dangerous open wound that needs radical surgery.

Summer is a state of mind, I don’t care about the weather

What the hell has happened to the weather? It’s August but it’s more like November!

We’ve only been back from our holiday for a week, but I could actually get away with wearing jeans and a jumper. This is not good. I’m fuming as I’m still in summer mode and want to drink Mojitos in the garden while topping up my tan as the barbecue sizzles. I want to pop into Morrisons to buy salad stuff and throw the windows wide open when I get home. Not dig out an umbrella, put the central heating on and have soup for lunch.

Well, rain and hurricane-strength winds can do one. I still have lovely brown legs so I’m going out in shorts regardless. Summer is just a state of mind.

The marriage world has officially gone barking mad

Okay, I’ve seen it all now. Switching on This Morning the other day, I had the dubious pleasure of seeing a woman – incidentally with way too much botox – get married to a dog.

The lovely Elizabeth had chosen to marry golden retriever Logan who looked suitably bemused as he panted his way through the service which took place in the TV studio.

No-one in the assembled congregation seemed able to keep a particularly straight face yet Elizabeth was overwhelmed with joy when the pair were pronounced dog and wife. Her family must be so proud…

Conclusive proof that the world has definitely gone barking mad and August is a slow month for news.