Well Gary, I reckon it was a game of, er, three-thirds

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Have I got mixed up with the months and it’s actually still spring? I only ask because news that FIFA could allow football matches at the 2022 World Cup finals in Qatar to be played over three 30-minute periods left me thinking that it must be April 1.

Apparently the possibility of this extraordinary break in tradition is to do with very high temperatures and the need for players to rehydrate – despite boasts that stadiums will be air-conditioned.

Two things. Number one, why award the World Cup to Qatar in the first place if it’s too hot to play football?

Secondly, how on earth are players and managers going to cope when it comes to the post-match interviews?

‘Well, Gary, it was a game of two halves – er, I mean three-thirds.’