Why would you decide to drive through floodwater?

Great. As I write this the weather has taken a turn for the better, just in time for my return to work after a week off filled with rain and cloud.
A car submerged in floodwaterA car submerged in floodwater
A car submerged in floodwater

Reports said that some parts of the country saw a month’s worth of rain fall in one hour.

Houses and people were getting hit by lightning and then we saw the usual TV reports of flash floods and submerged cars.

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Which begs the question: What the hell are people thinking when they try to drive through water this deep?

I saw that one man nearly died after he got trapped in his car while trying to go through floodwater.

I’m pleased he’s okay. But apparently there were alternative routes he could have taken.

Instead, for some reason he decided to test out the family people carrier as a submarine.

Why would you do that?

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If you were stuck in traffic by the Hilsea roundabout, you wouldn’t drive down to the creek for a quick shortcut into town, would you?

To attempt to drive through deep water, I think you either have to be stupid or the owner of an amphibious vehicle.

The car I saw stuck in floodwater was floating in so much of it, I half expected the Queen to make an appearance with a bottle of Moet, smash it on the bonnet and say ‘I name this ship HMS Zafira’.

And if your car does get submerged, good luck trying to claim on the insurance.

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With all of the media attention on such incidents, it’s not as if claims assessors will be in blissful ignorance about how your engine bay became a paddling pool.

Although if you were driving a Vauxhall Zafira, I suppose you could claim it had spontaneously combusted and that you were just trying to be responsible by dousing the flames.

And while we’re on the subject of flooding, here’s another thing.

I was surprised David Cameron didn’t seek to make a point about the heavy rains during his TV showdown with Nigel Farage. I expected him to claim that staying in the EU would give us more influence over the weather conditions arriving in this country from the Continent.

THIS PUNISHMENT TOOK STRICT PARENTING TO A NEW LEVEL

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The mum and dad of a seven-year-old Japanese boy, Yamato Tanooka, took strict parenting to a whole new level after they left him alone in a bear-infested woodland after he misbehaved.

Wow! The no sweets for a week and the 10 minutes on the naughty step punishment was raised a few degrees and then smashed out of the park by this one.

I dread to think what will happen next time he misbehaves.

The boy was found after six days and reportedly told his relieved father: ‘You’re a good dad, I forgive you.’

Yeah, right. These things tend to leave big emotional scars.

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Let’s just hope he doesn’t secretly spend the next 10 years of his life plotting his father’s untimely demise.

HOW ABOUT STARTING TO FINE CYCLISTS AS WELL AS MOTORISTS?

So the government is looking to impose a minimum distance between cars and cyclists, with fines reaching £5,000 for motorists deemed to be driving dangerously.

That’s just marvellous. How about starting to fine cylists too?

You know, the ones who think they’re Bradley Wiggins, cycling about the place in race formation, jumping red lights and cutting people up.

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Because they can’t be identified, it gives them licence to provoke motorists and then put their silly helmet cam videos on YouTube.

If they’re riding two abreast along the top of Portsdown Hill, where are motorists supposed to go?

On to the grass verge and around the cannon outside Fort Widley?