STEVE POWER: Making out you are a connoisseur will get yousome expensive plonk

n New evidence apparently shows that being a morning or an evening person appears to be linked to the hour of your birth. This means morning people would have been born in the morning and evening people would have been born in the evening. Just one question though, if you’re grumpy all day long, does this mean that you don’t actually exist?

n According to German research, waddling like a penguin is the best way to avoid slipping and falling over in icy weather. I can see one problem with this, if you start waddling like a Penguin everyone who sees you doing it will end up falling over after collapsing on the floor in uncontrollable laughter!

n Does anyone else do this at the start of the year? If certain good friends tell you they’re popping round, you get out the Christmas gifts they got you last month and place them strategically around your house so they can see them and know that you’re using them in some way. It could be chocolates in a bowl, or soap in the bathroom. It’s all done to make them feel that they bought you something you really like. Then as soon as they’ve gone you hide the cheap tat away. vending machines at some train stations in France are going to start giving out short stories for commuters to read while they’re waiting for their train. Is anyone else pretty sure this idea won’t be coming to the south coast? Imagine how long it would take, and also how expensive it would be for these machines to print entire copies of ‘War and Peace’ or ′Encyclopaedia Britannica′ for our commuters to read!

Who else goes into a record shop every now and then and wonders why the ′World Music′ section is always so small? Just think about it, mind baffling…

Catch Steve Power At Breakfast, Monday to Friday 05.30-09.00 on Wave 105.

et anditiae eum enti cuptam conectem remporias iunturis simporest, ut quatat voluptiis nonsed ut eum eum nate