World-beating podcast My Dad Wrote a Porno is set to visit Portsmouth

But what he got instead was a fumbling attempt at erotica, sewn together by clunky vocabulary and toe-curling sexual analogies – and not for the right reasons.

Under the laughable yet enigmatic pen name of ‘Rocky Flintstone’, his Irish dad, who is happily married, crafted Belinda Blinked – a tome bereft of the elegance and seduction readers in this Fifty Shades age yearn for in their droves.

What he passed on to his son was the blueprint for a laugh-out-loud world where breasts ‘hang like pomegranates’ – and now that world is set to claim the stage of Portsmouth Guildhall, live, on May 8 at 7.30pm.

Aptly named My Dad Wrote a Porno, Jamie’s podcast with broadcaster pals Alice Levine and James Cooper has split sides the world over.

What began as an animated weekly table reading of chapters of his dad’s book in Alice’s kitchen – with Rocky’s permission, of course – has now evolved into a global sensation.

Off the back of three comically-acclaimed iTunes series and 100 million digital downloads, the trio have embarked on a world tour – taking them on sell-out stops in the United States and Australia.

Now, they will return to England, where they have made fans of scores of commuters and celebrities – including Hollywood stars Elijah Wood, Michael Sheen and Daisy Ridley.

Tickets to the trio’s live show in the city are £31.80 at portsmouthguildhall.org.uk.