Fostering in Portsmouth: Find out how you could give a young person a secure and stable home
Children of all ages may need to live somewhere else, either for a short time or as a long-term solution, in a place they can call home.
The reasons are as varied as the young people, and the foster carers that care for them. We got the views of three foster families in Portsmouth to find out a bit more of what’s involved.
Nina and Keith’s story
Nina and Keith have been fostering for five years with Foster Portsmouth. They’ve cared for 12 youngsters altogether. They progressed to siblings, and they now care for two groups of two siblings.
They said: "We are very busy, but we wouldn't have it any other way."
Nina and Keith initially planned to care for children aged 5 to 12 once they were approved. However, the first child Nina and Keith cared for was a baby, before then caring for Calli*, a 13-year-old girl who made them realise the type of fostering they really wanted to do.
Calli was one of a large group of siblings who had not been able to stay together. Seeing Calli spend time with her siblings, and witnessing their bond, inspired Nina and Keith to foster siblings in order to keep them together and keep that familial bond strong – they even moved to a larger property so they’d have space to take on two groups of siblings
"When the two groups first met, they did not get along at all. But we went on supportive training courses aimed at the needs of the children, worked closely with Foster Portsmouth, took them on bonding activities and days out, and worked with them at home, and they now get along as a group of four. It's wonderful to see."
When Calli first moved in with them, she had a low attendance record at school and was out of her school routine. Keith was able to discover the underlying reasons for her dislike of school, so he could help her get back into education.
"At the time, I worked with my brother-in-law and he was very understanding of Nina and I fostering. I was able to drive Calli to school, pick her up, and attend any and all school meetings. After six months, she was confident enough to take the bus to school on her own.
"She's in her first year of university now and doing fantastically well. We are so proud of her and the journey she has taken."
Michael’s story
Michael, a 49-year-old full-time IT project manager, fosters teenagers on his own. Before moving to Portsmouth, Michael fostered with a London-based agency.
“I spent the majority of my childhood in long-term foster care with the same wonderful carers. I might not have had the amazing opportunities they gave me without them,” he said. "I wanted to give something back to children who needed some much-needed care and stability in their lives because I'm so appreciative of my foster carers and the life path they helped pave for me."
He’s fostered six children and his three longer-term placements have all been with teenagers, one of whom was an unaccompanied child seeking asylum.
“The challenge with teenagers, particularly older teenage boys, is that they'll already have their own routines in place by the time they arrive at your house. It's pointless trying to impose strict rules and routines on them because they'll rebel and do whatever they want anyway.
“My role is more about incorporating their existing routines in the most beneficial way for them. Rather than attempting to set their path for them, steer them in the right direction.”
He says the appreciation makes any hard work worthwhile.
“Teenage boys are often thought of as not expressing or discussing their emotions. But there have been many touching moments between me and the young men I've fostered over the years, which makes it all worthwhile and lets me know that I've been a positive chapter in their story,” he said.
And he has one piece of advice for anyone fostering teenage boys: “Always keep a supply of food on hand!”
Rachel’s story
Rachel, a 47-year-old full-time sole foster carer for over 20 years, now cares for unaccompanied children seeking refuge.
Rachel, who was adopted herself, says switching to her current type of fostering is: “The best thing I’ve ever done. It’s been fantastic.”
"Despite the fact that it takes two to three years to get to England and that they go through unimaginable hardships, the boys I've cared for are so humble, grateful, and full of kindness.
"The look on their faces is absolutely priceless when they return home from their place of education and they've passed an exam or got a good grade on their coursework and they hear that you are proud of them. The same as when I learn a new word in one of their languages and correctly pronounce it."
And her advice to others thinking about it?
“Do it! It will change your life as well as theirs. It did mine. 100%.”
What happens if you apply to foster?
If you decide to apply to become a foster carer with Foster Portsmouth, a member of our friendly team will contact you via phone to ask a little bit more about you and answer any questions you have to help you decide if you want to go onto the next stage. Next, there will be an initial home visit from an assessing social worker to look round your home and talk to you and anyone in your household. You’ll be asked about your family, background and home circumstances and why you want to become a foster carer.
And if you and the assessor are happy to go ahead there will be an assessment process of up to six months before attending the fostering panel, following this the team will discuss placing a young person with you.
Nina and Keith remember it well. They said it was sometimes hard to remember details of their lives, as you'll be asked about your life from the age of 18, but they enjoyed the process, and it made them want to become foster carers more than ever.
More information on the assessment process can be found here.
Find out more
More people like these, who offer their hearts and homes to vulnerable young people, are needed in and around the Portsmouth area.
Foster Portsmouth welcomes foster carers from all backgrounds, regardless of nationality, relationship status, or religious beliefs.
There's no upper age limit, and you don’t need to own a home. Prospective carers must be at least 21 years old, have a spare room, some experience with young people, and a lot of patience, resilience, and a positive outlook.
Foster Portsmouth offers carers fantastic allowances for the children in their care, thorough training and continuing 24/7 support, access to the award-winning Mockingbird model of care, social activities, and free membership to The Fostering Network.
If you feel ready to start your fostering journey, or if you have further questions to ask, you can call 023 9283 4071 or email [email protected].
*Names changed to protect identities.
There’s more information online and more stories like these from foster carers in the area