I miss my grandchildren so much and feel lonely | Agony Aunt

Fiona Caine helps a man who is feeling down and lonely. Picture: iStock/PA.Fiona Caine helps a man who is feeling down and lonely. Picture: iStock/PA.
Fiona Caine helps a man who is feeling down and lonely. Picture: iStock/PA.
Our agony aunt, Fiona Caine, answers your questions.

Question: Until 20 months ago, I was one of the fittest 72-year-old men around. I used to have my four grandchildren over to my house every weekend. I used to take them out and play football with them and I was really enjoying life.

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But then came the coronavirus and I feel I’ve lost everything. I live on my own and see no one any more, because my daughter thinks I’m at risk and won’t bring the children near me. I feel this virus has destroyed my life.

Answer: As tough as it is, your daughter is trying to keep you safe because she loves you. Being cut off from the love and support of our families is hideous and we need to find new ways of interacting with them. Could you set up video calling with your grandchildren? Seeing people – even if through a computer screen – is so much better than just hearing their voices, so please try and explore some of these options.

Contact Age UK (0800 678 1602) as could match you up with a befriending volunteer. Eventually, this pandemic will pass.

WHY WON’T MY PARTNER’S TEENAGE DAUGHTER LEAVE US ALONE?

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Question: My partner has a 14-year-old daughter and over the past year, she has had to live with us. I have found it increasingly difficult to cope because the girl is hanging around us all the time.

My partner and I can never be alone together. I know she must have found it difficult at first to adjust to her father having a new partner, but surely after a year she should have come to terms with it. I’ve tried to explain to my partner how uncomfortable this is making me, but he seems unable or unwilling to tackle it.

Answer: Frankly, I am amazed that you can’t see that his daughter is important too! She’s been uprooted from her home to live with her father and a woman she doesn’t know. What do you expect your partner to do with her at times when you don’t want her around? Lock her in her room?

I’m sorry if I sound harsh, but I think you are the one being a bit unreasonable here. You can’t simply dismiss a child whenever you think he or she has become inconvenient.

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