International Men's Day: Stop Domestic Abuse supports Armed Forces veteran who suffered horrible relationship

Stop Domestic Abuse charity have shared some harrowing statistics and one testimony on International Men’s Day (November 19). Professionals at the organisation supported Ben, an Armed Forces veteran who reached out to them for confidential help.

He had experienced an abusive relationship three years ago with a former partner, which is continuing to affect his mental health and ability to form relationships. Stop Domestic Abuse, based in Havant, gave him one-to-one support to help him overcome his anxiety and give him a better understanding of healthy relationships.

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Ben said: “I am beyond appreciative of the team at Stop Domestic Abuse. I’ve come so far from where I was three years ago, and it wouldn’t have happened without your help. I would say to anybody else thinking about doing it – just do it.”

The charity said one in six men and boys will be a victim of domestic abuse at some point in their lifetime. The organisation supported 632 men and boys across Portsmouth, Southampton and Hampshire in 2022.

Nationally, nearly half of male victims – 49 per cent – fail to tell anyone they are a victim of domestic abuse and are two and a half times less likely to speak up compared to female victims. Of these victims, 11 per cent consider taking their own life.

Stop Domestic Abuse supports anyone affected by domestic abuse – offering men emotional and practical support, including help related to housing, finance or navigating the criminal justice system. CEO Claire Lambon said: “To mark International Men’s Day we are highlighting the support available to male victims like ‘Ben’.

"There is free, confidential help available across Hampshire; we urge men not to suffer in silence. Our specialist team is here to support male victims to access the emotional and practical support they need to cope with their abuse experience and move on to find safety for themselves and their children.

"Support is provided on a one-to-one basis, in person or virtually. It’s important to remember that domestic abuse is not just physical. It can take different forms including coercive control, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, financial abuse, physical abuse, digital abuse and psychological abuse.

"For men fleeing from abuse, we can offer safe accommodation in one of our dispersed properties or support to find alternative safe accommodation.” The charity is also working with Portsmouth FC to raise awareness about its services – with the free helpline being printed on 22,000 fixture cards.

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The helpline number is 0330 016 5112. Further resources can also be found on their website.

If you are affected by any of the issues raised in this article you can talk to your GP, phone 111 or text SHOUT to 85258.

Alternatively you can call the Samaritans on 116 123, email [email protected] or visit the website. There is also a list of local services available here.

If you've been affected by suicide, Amparo is a dedicated support service providing practical and emotional support after bereavement. Call 0330 088 9255, email [email protected] or visit amparo.org.uk.