Portsmouth mum objects to Portchester Crematorium's ground clearance policy - and considers removing son's ashes from the site

Karen James from Cosham claims that flowers, plaques and other memorial items are now removed on an almost daily basis from the ‘garden of remembrance’ where her son’s remains were scattered. She insists that she was never told it was forbidden to mark the spot and she had done so without issue for almost a decade.

She also alleges that the objects have been damaged in the process and are carelessly placed in a pile or thrown away entirely.

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The 58-year-old said that a plaque with Martin’s name was removed a day after it was placed – and broken in the process. Her son Martin died suddenly at the age of 27 leaving behind a one-year-old son. Karen wishes to mark the site of Martin’s ashes so her grandson can find it in future.

Karen said: ‘This is about six months now that we’ve had to put up with this. I was 15 when my mum passed away so she’s been there 43 years now and my grandparents are there as well - we never had any issues.

‘We lost our son, who served in the army, nine years ago and he wanted to be put with my mum.

‘Nine years his stuff’s been there, his plaque’s been there, the soldiers come down and they know where he is because his plaque’s there. They took all of that away and they’ve dismantled his plaque.

‘It’s not just us that’s suffering with this, everybody is. Even on Remembrance Day, we went up there on Friday, November 11 and put his poppies down . On the Sunday there were some soldiers that came to our house and they went to lay stuff, and all his poppies had gone.

‘In my eyes, that is an absolute disgrace. It's upsetting enough to lose a child and obviously we kept it nice up there and then all of a sudden they started doing this. Removing the poppies is absolutely disgusting.’

Martin James died in 2014 from sudden Sudden Arrhythmic Death Syndrome. He is fondly remembered as a father, soldier who served in Iraq and Afghanistan and a supporter of Arsenal Football Club. Karen added: ‘Absolutely everybody loved him, he was a gentle giant.’

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Portchester Crematorium Joint Committee chairman Councillor Joanne Burton said: ‘Staff are aware of the sensitivities removing items can cause and understands it is likely to be upsetting for those people who have left them, but equally get a number of thanks from those who dislike these objects being left which detract from the attractiveness of the gardens and what most families wish to see when they visit.’

The crematorium confirmed that the policy has been enforced more regularly over the past few years. A committee statement said that people are made aware that ‘individual memorial plots’ are not permitted in its scattering gardens as they may offend others.

Portchester Crematorium is managed and operated by a joint committee of councillors from Fareham, Gosport, Havant and Portsmouth. Its regulations forbid any items to be placed other than flowers within green vases supplied by the crematorium.